My wife found this image a couple of weeks ago on Facebook and asked what the bastard had to say about it. Always being one for replying to things in a timely manner, here is my short and sweet answer:
I think the headline says it all, I would not be caught dead in such a contraption. It’s inanely ridiculous that he needs to inconvenience himself publicly in such a manner in front of all their friends.
How low can one stoop in trying to live up to some ableist norm? Apparently low enough to hang from the ceiling like some crippled Pinoccio at one’s own wedding.
I am pretty sure if my wife saw me hanging like that she’d get all excited and think it was some new kinky game I had invented. And in that case I would find it rather inappropriate in front of our wedding guests.